By Coach Kevin Written in 2022
Ricardo De La Riva is a pillar of the jiu-jitsu community — a living link to the foundations of our art. To many, he represents honor, mastery, and the Bushido code. But for decades, the same patriarchal values promoted by the old guard have been handcuffed to an outdated, often toxic culture of misogyny.
Recently, that culture came crashing into the spotlight.
World champion Claudia Do Val, a longtime student of De La Riva, discussed their past relationship during an emotional interview on Paola Diana’s London-based show Unleashed, The Game Changers. She described a sexual relationship that, while she did not claim was criminal, she characterized as deeply inappropriate in the student–teacher dynamic.
No charges have been filed. Legally, the encounter appears to fall within the boundaries of consent. But legality is not the same as morality — and it raises a bigger question: Did it violate the ethical code between coach and student that our sport should be built on?
What made the situation worse, in my opinion, was De La Riva’s response. His initial statement, via a legal representative, was neither denial nor admission — just a list of past accomplishments and character references. Then, in a move that stunned the community, he announced he would be eliminating female classes entirely and no longer offering co-ed training.
For me, that decision spoke volumes. Instead of facing the hard conversation, he doubled down on the outdated belief that removing women from the room “solves” the problem. It’s a mindset that still lingers in the darker corners of BJJ — a holdover from the days when women weren’t even allowed to train.
The truth is, sexual attraction in close-contact environments is a reality. Adults will form relationships. Sometimes they work, sometimes they implode. But when it happens between coach and student, the power imbalance changes everything. The student’s trust is the currency. The instructor’s role is to protect that — not profit from it.
Even if the student pursues the relationship, it’s on the coach to say no. That’s leadership. That’s integrity. And that’s where De La Riva, in my view, committed his greatest failure.
This could have been his defining moment — a chance to own his mistake, apologize, and show the community that the old guard can evolve. But instead of taking that road, he chose silence, deflection, and exclusion.
As a coach, I know the influence we have over our students’ lives. It’s a privilege that comes with a responsibility to protect their trust, even from ourselves. De La Riva missed the chance to lead by example, and in doing so, tarnished the legacy so many of us respected.
If you believe the future of jiu-jitsu means breaking outdated traditions and building a culture of respect for all students, join the community I’m building at Gracie Trinity Online Academy. Get training, resources, and support for a modern, inclusive jiu-jitsu journey: https://www.skool.com/gracie-trinity-academy
